False friends in a small town
I live in a small town.
People are interesting. They either take to you or they don't. This happens in big cities as well, but you don't see the results as often. If you are not liked in a small town, you can either rise above it, say to yourself that they don't know you and wait til they calm down and do ... or you turn tail and run, or you gravitate to others that have also been "labelled" by the town.
I am strange I suppose in that I could care less who you are. I don't need friends so badly that I have to entertain bullshit, liars, nasty people or people that just like to cause trouble because they're too afraid to look inside themselves and correct their own challenges.
Fortunately I had lived on an island for 15 years before I moved to this town, and I learned the fine art of walking down the street and passing someone like you didn't even see them. It was a hard skill to learn for me ... I am very upfront ... but gradually learned the value of rising above it all and just walkin on by. Eventually I began to find that people did gravitate towards me but not because they didn't like me ... more that they admired someone who had a good reputation, earned on my own merit ... they know I will walk away from any job or person who treats me or anyone else like crap ... I treat my staff well and encourage them to treat themselves well. I have a hard time tolerating the "victim" mentality up here ... People choose to be here for the most part ... they either choose to remain fearful of what else is out there or fearful that they will fail if they leave ... (not realising that they can come home if they want to).
I think fear is our biggest killer. I think its what causes cancer and most illnesses. I have found it at times challenging to not really feel the same kind of fear that others feel. If I do feel it then I just overcome it ... and sometimes that "just' takes me a week, a month or a year to overcome but I do work on it.
Those are the types of people that I like associating with. We all have challenges. I just find that if you consistently point fingers outside ... you will never overcome your fears. And pleading victim to me will not make things better. I will simply walk away.
It takes courage to be willing to be on your own rather than put up with shallow fucked up people, or fearful people who want to drag you down to their level. Well sorry buds, but been there and bought the t-shirt and I ain't goin back!
So if you want to make me pay for your inablility to stand up for your rights, want me to listen to you continual excuses as to why you don't make the necessary changes in your life, then I am not the friend for you.
If however, you want to continually work on bettering your life, your mind, and stop blaming others, then by all means ... perhaps we could be friends.
Until then ... please don't call. I don't want to hear about your alcoholic boyfriend that you feel you have no choice to be with because you're 60 pounds overweight and you feel insecure about your looks. I don't want to hear about you being broke when you spend almost 2000.00 for a new TV and computer ... when your mother needs money to pay her taxes and you and theboyfriend don't even pay rent. I don't want to hear from your mother about how she doesn't have the money to pay her taxes because she doesn't charge you rent. You have all created your own little dysfunctional world. You take exception to someone like me who has the strength not to be sucked into it, and attempt to point the finger at me.
Nope .... no can do ... I don't care for alcoholic anyones, I don't care for marytr mothers, I don't care for women who allow themselves to be in positions where they are trapped ... or women who can't confront issues, instead running around like a victim having everyone go there there.
I want grown up friends ... who know when to play like a child ... and mature enough to be an adult.
People are interesting. They either take to you or they don't. This happens in big cities as well, but you don't see the results as often. If you are not liked in a small town, you can either rise above it, say to yourself that they don't know you and wait til they calm down and do ... or you turn tail and run, or you gravitate to others that have also been "labelled" by the town.
I am strange I suppose in that I could care less who you are. I don't need friends so badly that I have to entertain bullshit, liars, nasty people or people that just like to cause trouble because they're too afraid to look inside themselves and correct their own challenges.
Fortunately I had lived on an island for 15 years before I moved to this town, and I learned the fine art of walking down the street and passing someone like you didn't even see them. It was a hard skill to learn for me ... I am very upfront ... but gradually learned the value of rising above it all and just walkin on by. Eventually I began to find that people did gravitate towards me but not because they didn't like me ... more that they admired someone who had a good reputation, earned on my own merit ... they know I will walk away from any job or person who treats me or anyone else like crap ... I treat my staff well and encourage them to treat themselves well. I have a hard time tolerating the "victim" mentality up here ... People choose to be here for the most part ... they either choose to remain fearful of what else is out there or fearful that they will fail if they leave ... (not realising that they can come home if they want to).
I think fear is our biggest killer. I think its what causes cancer and most illnesses. I have found it at times challenging to not really feel the same kind of fear that others feel. If I do feel it then I just overcome it ... and sometimes that "just' takes me a week, a month or a year to overcome but I do work on it.
Those are the types of people that I like associating with. We all have challenges. I just find that if you consistently point fingers outside ... you will never overcome your fears. And pleading victim to me will not make things better. I will simply walk away.
It takes courage to be willing to be on your own rather than put up with shallow fucked up people, or fearful people who want to drag you down to their level. Well sorry buds, but been there and bought the t-shirt and I ain't goin back!
So if you want to make me pay for your inablility to stand up for your rights, want me to listen to you continual excuses as to why you don't make the necessary changes in your life, then I am not the friend for you.
If however, you want to continually work on bettering your life, your mind, and stop blaming others, then by all means ... perhaps we could be friends.
Until then ... please don't call. I don't want to hear about your alcoholic boyfriend that you feel you have no choice to be with because you're 60 pounds overweight and you feel insecure about your looks. I don't want to hear about you being broke when you spend almost 2000.00 for a new TV and computer ... when your mother needs money to pay her taxes and you and theboyfriend don't even pay rent. I don't want to hear from your mother about how she doesn't have the money to pay her taxes because she doesn't charge you rent. You have all created your own little dysfunctional world. You take exception to someone like me who has the strength not to be sucked into it, and attempt to point the finger at me.
Nope .... no can do ... I don't care for alcoholic anyones, I don't care for marytr mothers, I don't care for women who allow themselves to be in positions where they are trapped ... or women who can't confront issues, instead running around like a victim having everyone go there there.
I want grown up friends ... who know when to play like a child ... and mature enough to be an adult.
posted by The Domestic Goddess @ 11:38 AM
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